There are some commonly used phrases in Gay porn that make me want to scream every time I see them used.  Or should I say over used?  They are often so ridiculously absurd it boggles the mind why someone would think it turns on the consumer.  Let’s explore some, shall we?

return the favor
This one is SO overused it’s pathetic.  Has everyone forgotten the word reciprocate?  Or is that too big of a word for both the writers and readers of Gay porn descriptions?  How about “wanting to please his partner equally” for a nice change?

take it like a champ
Champ, short for champion, alludes to the winner of a sporting competition.  I thought these guys were having sex!  While there are some exceptions, most of the time sex is not a sporting event, nor is it an endurance trial.  It’s supposed to be fun!  HELLO???

for all its worth
I’m sorry, but can someone please tell me how much riding a cock or sucking dick is worth these days?  Does the price differ depending on the cock in use?  Does the director tell the model exactly how much its worth, so he will deliver just the right performance?

taking one for the team
I’m going to go out on a limb here and suggest there isn’t one single guy in gay porn today that considers himself part of anyone’s team.  What is it with everyone wanting to turn sex into a team sport?

not to be out done
Here we go again with sex being compared to a competition.  This isn’t about who can spit the furthest.  It’s SEX!

took it like a trooper
Well, I suppose if we are describing something within the military or uniform niche this would be a nice play on words.  Trooper is a horse-cavalry soldier, or mounted (horseback) police officer.  OH, I get it!  He’s being fucked by a guy who’s hung like a horse.  Actually, as an idiom, it means with great energy, enthusiasm, or display.  But why does everything in porn have to be described like its some sort of competition or unpleasant ordeal?

to be reckoned with
When used to describe a person this phrase means of considerable importance or influence.  A person that is famous.  But in most cases the context suggests “a force to be reckoned with”, which once again implies all this sex consumers are watching is some sort of competition or test of endurance.  WOW!  That’s a real turn on!

works it with precision and skill
What?  Is he a doctor doing open heart surgery?  I didn’t know precision was a requirement for good sex.  Last time I checked, sex was about passion and lust.  But some people want to turn it into a dance contest.

like a pro
Can someone please tell me exactly what the difference is between a professional and amateur cock sucker?  At what point did being a professional at sex become a turn on for consumers?  Or is its use supposed to be some sort of comparison to a pro athlete? It would not surprise me, considering how many other commonly used porn phrases find their roots in contact sports.

While this is a bit of a tongue and cheek look at commonly used gay porn phrases, I would really appreciate it if those writing descriptions would climb out of their rut and use some creativity for a change.